The first step to self-discovery is to be honest with yourself. Never fool your subconscious!

Let us understand why marriage exists. As a human being, either as a man or a woman, you have certain needs. When you were eight years old, if I had asked you about marriage, the question would not have meant anything to you. If I had asked you when you were fourteen, you might have been a little shy because you were considering. Because your body started growing in a certain way and hormones started infecting your intelligence, you were thinking about it. If I had asked you at eighteen, there would have been a clear "yes" or "no, not now" or "not at all", depending on what happened to you between the ages of fourteen to eighteen.

The word “marriage” might have acquired a very negative aura around it in certain parts of the world now, because there is a sense of juvenile freedom. Young people in some societies perceive marriage as a bad thing. When you are young, you are against it, because your physical body is in a certain mode. Marriage looks like a bondage and a chain. You want to do things in a certain way. But slowly, when the body weakens, once again you wish there was someone with you in a committed way.

This is a very juvenile feeling – “When I am strong I do not need anyone, when I become weak, I wish there was someone with me.” I think a partnership should be formed when you are at the peak of your well-being. When you have fallen, you will make desperate partnerships. When you are well, when you are at the peak of your life, that is when you must make a partnership which will take you through all those ups and downs.

As a human being, you have emotional needs, psychological needs, and social and economic needs. People may not want to consciously think about these things because they think their marriage will become ugly if they do. But these needs and considerations do exist.

For women today, the world has changed to some extent. She need not necessarily get married for social and economic reasons. She has a choice. She can take care of her own economic and social situations. It was not so a hundred years ago. There is a little bit of freedom now. At least two of the reasons why you need to get married are out. You have to consider the other three.

Psychologically, do you need a companion in your life? Do you need emotional companionship? And how strong are your physical needs? You must look at this as an individual. This is not a social prescription – everyone gets married or no one gets married. It is not going to work that way. As an individual, how strong are your needs? Is this some kind of a passing need that you can easily go beyond? If it is, do not get married because it is not worth getting tied up. If you do, it is not just two people but a family that has to face the consequences. I am not saying marriage is wrong. Do you want it, that is the question. Each individual should consider this for himself or herself, not by the social norm.

There is nothing wrong with getting married. But if you get married without you needing to do so, then it is a crime, because you will cause misery to yourself and at least one other person. When someone asked Gautama the Buddha, “Should I have a companion?” he said, “It’s better to walk alone than to walk with a fool.” I am not that cruel. I am saying: that if you find a similar fool, then something can be worked out. But based on your need – not because of what society is saying, not because others are getting married.

Marriage or Live-in?I would say, that at least 25 to 30 percent of the people do not need to get into marriage because it is just a passing interest for them. For another 30 to 40 percent, it may be a little longer and they get into this. For 10 to 12 years they feel good and after that, they think it is a burden. But there are some people for whom the need is very strong. About 25 to 30 percent need partnerships for a much longer period – they need to get into such arrangements.

Right now, people have found other kinds of solutions. “Okay, I won’t get married, I will just live in.” If you are just living with one person, it is a marriage, whether you have a certificate or not.  The body imbibes and retains experiences beyond the memory that you carry in your mind.

Either you go into marriage or you simply go beyond these needs. But this is something that you have to look at individually – how strong is your need? If you want to look at this with clarity, without social influence, it is always best that you take some time off, let's say a month. When you make this decision, you must be in a state of clarity. You must not be influenced by anyone. Just meditate and bring yourself into a certain state of clarity. In that clarity, look at how strong your needs are.

If you find that marriage is not necessary, that is it, once you make a decision, do not look that way. If you decide to go one way, do not look the other way. You must do one of these things. If you hang around in between, you will remain in a constant state of confusion. “Which is the best thing?” There is no best thing. Live your life in such a way that whatever you are doing, you are doing that. If you have this quality, whatever you do, it is fine.

Rab Rakha!!!!!

The moment you realize there is incredible beauty in not knowing!

Life, as you know, is a journey filled with twists, turns, and unexpected challenges. Letting go is really hard, especially when you have to let go of something you really want, whether it’s a great opportunity, someone you really liked or loved or even any expectations you had about something. I don’t think anyone knows how to completely let go or not fall back from time to time if they do, but there are definitely ways to make it easier for you to let go when you relentlessly don’t want to let go.

Anything that feels forced or more difficult than it should be, or that causes you pain and sorrow, is not designed for you. Having this mindset or faith will help you overcome the hesitation that comes with deciding whether or not to let go. Things destined for you have a way of finding their way into your life. The more you struggle for something that was never meant for you, the more it will fight back. You may eventually obtain what you desire, but it may not last and you may not be comfortable with it. The beauty of things designed for you is that they just happen; sometimes against all odds. We are simply programmed to complicate things.

“If you’re brave enough to say goodbye, life will reward you with a new hello.”

Letting go is extremely excruciating when you feel "halted," and it can sometimes appear impossible to do, but the truth is that if you've reached this point, it means you've worked so hard to make this thing work in a positive way, or reach your goal, and it can sometimes feel like we've tried so hard or come so far that letting go now will feel like a waste of time given the time and effort we invested in it. But, even if it feels like it, nothing is ever a waste of time; we are here to make mistakes and learn lessons in order to grow as individuals; if we continue to hold on to situations that are detrimental or negativity because we've already done too much or it's too late to change things, we are only setting ourselves up for an empty existence. There is strength in letting go, a power that gives greater peace and tranquility than staying in conditions that cause your emotions to pine every day.

When you reflect on your life, you will find yourself laughing at times when you thought you would never be able to let go of someone, or when you held on to something so firmly only to discover later that it was not right for you. Great things happen to us all the time in many kinds and forms; we just prefer to focus on the not-so-great. dread is defined as holding on to something out of dread that it will never happen again. We must be fearless when it comes to letting go.

“See it for what is, not what you want it to be.”

The truth is that if letting go is your only option, it usually implies that this object or someone has already let you go. You are attempting to remain in a place where you are no longer welcome. The mind has a funny way of deceiving us into thinking certain things in order to make it less painful for us, or to frame it in a way that doesn't actually damage our pride or break our heart, but we have to look at it as it is, not as we want to view it. This isn't an optical illusion; it's reality, and what you see is what you receive.

If an opportunity passed you by because it didn't want to stop at your station, if someone let you go because they didn't want to stay, if someone else got what you were asking for, this blessing was not written for you in the first place, and you will be blessed in another way. Let go of your fear, your past, your mistakes, your fears, your failures, and your self-doubt as you continue to learn the skill of letting go. Allow yourself enough forgiveness to let go of the pieces of yourself that dull your brightness.

Rab Rakha!!!!!

If you can learn to detach your emotions from a lot of things, you are most likely to be the happiest!

Strange occurrences enter our lives when we become attached to objects, people, or a specific way of being. Why? We fear losing that to which we are bonded when we become attached to something and change happens, which is a constant.

However, dissociation frees us from being bound to a particular result, allowing for change to happen. We shall be able to accept things as they are and let calm into our life thanks to this realism.

But how can we learn to step back from the things that really matter to us? Furthermore, why does related hit us?Any person, event, condition, or scenario that is no longer serving a divine purpose in your life is something you should release and detach from. Everything has its season, and every season has to finish. Select a fresh season that is full of meaningful ideas and pursuits.

Attachments are mental or emotional relationships that we have with anything other than ourselves. We accumulate luggage as we travel through life. Some of it we like, some we rely on, and some we aren't even conscious we have. However, we become so entwined with them that they can define us and dictate our path of conduct.

Being linked to anything drains energy. Why? Because our clinginess causes us to focus just on one repercussions. It restricts the options that the Universe has to offer. Because we feel that there is just one thing that will make us happy. When the outcome differs from what we believe we want, we are unable to perceive that this conclusion is superior to what we believed we desired. Worry is the attachment's lost energy. It stems from a fear of loss and is extremely disempowering.

So, what may people become emotionally attached to? Relationships, career opportunities, outcomes, thoughts, views, perceptions, money, status, titles, automobiles, homes, ideas, other people's opinions, and labels are all valid.When we allow attachment to occur, we get overly emotionally involved. This immersion leads to scared thinking, which leads to a lack of action, even if the change is for the best. These ties have a negative impact on rational thinking and prevent us from perceiving prospective outcomes and better options.Attachment is the great fabricator of illusions; reality can be attained only by someone who is detached. 

Detachment is the process of releasing the egoic emotional ties that bind us. It is the ability to let go of the negativity of our situations. It is not a case of quitting or not caring. Instead, it's about embracing what is, enjoying what we have, and designing the life we want.

Detachment appears to be a calm individual in a difficult situation who actively seeks a solution without being emotionally charged. It is establishing personal boundaries so that the negativity of others does not touch us. Detaching takes time because it demands us to redefine our perceptions of our relationships, beliefs, and dreams. It enables us to be more patient and empathetic toward others. It also means that we are learning to trust the Universe, which knows just what we require to grow and extend our souls.

Learn to embrace the unknown. As we progress into uncertainty, we realize that security is really an egoic fiction designed to block us from fulfilling our ambitions. Discover your faith in the Universe and your soulful self-confidence to recognize the proper path for your life. Feel everything. Detachment does not imply suppressing our feelings. Instead, we must acknowledge, feel, and then release them. We recognize that our emotions are only sensations. We are not to keep them. Allow them to depart.

The Law of Detachment: 

1) Allow yourself and others the freedom to be who they are. 

2) Do not force solutions allow solutions to spontaneously emerge. 

3) Uncertainty is essential, and your path to freedom. 

Happiness comes from within, not from beyond. When you let go of your attachment to things, people, and results, you allow joy to spring from within you since external circumstances no longer have control over your happiness.Our attachment to people and things reflects our dread of losing them. We lessen our hold when we separate from them. We let them be themselves and enjoy them more. We regard them as a blessing in our lives because we adore them. We no longer perceive them through the lens of dread and possible loss.

Un-attachment offers peace of mind, self-confidence, empowerment, and happiness. Genuine freedom comes through detachment.True detachment isn’t separation from life but the absolute freedom within your mind to explore living. 

When you can detach from the past and look forward without attaching to the outcomes, happiness becomes a regular part of your life. Detachment helps us reframe missteps and helps focus us on the positive characteristics in our lives.

Enjoy the moment while it is there and when the moment starts disappearing, as everything is bound to disappear, let it go. That is detachment.

Rab Rakha!!!!!