Opinions aren't facts. Stop worrying about what people think about you!

 

People say I'm communicating less these days. To be frank, I've intentionally severed a number of loose ends in my relationships& friendships. Some acquaintances who speak to me on various levels follow me with their curious eyes and ask, 'Hey, why aren't you talking to him these days?' 'Why aren't you seen with her now?'

Wait, am I asking these questions for self-awareness or to be able to respond to those around me? True, we are always concerned with looking good in public. So far, my life has been a roller coaster ride.

People who ask intrusive questions irritate me. 'Do you have a husband?' What is the number of kids you have? 'Do you have a property?' To be honest, I'm tempted to tell them on their faces, "Why can't you mind your own business, I actually imply, your life?" Regrettably, we treat all of our relationships as if they were business transactions. But we make things happen. Why do people encroach into the lives of others? Is their life so stinky that they don't want to look at it and prefer to avoid it by putting the emphasis on the lives of others?

These people irritate me. They appear to be blind egg sacs of force that binds beliefs, diving within illusory bounds, too lazy and timid to look beyond them, until their last breath. So, how useful is it to put me out there in front of them? Besides, why should I offer my life for their idle chatter and gossip? Do I put my happiness in the hands of others? No. No way.

But we are obligated to these multitudes of codes and relationships from the moment we are born. It's all fixed and tied down. There is no empty space. We don't cross that heavily guarded line. And we are told what to wear, what to eat, what to study, and who to marry. All of our preferences and choices are made for us.

Constant reminders keep us on track. 'You do this and don't do that.' You'll get a lot of applause if you do this. However, if you do this, you will be rendered ineffective.' We do not question, but rather weave our lives around these predetermined social and religious norms.

We can avoid religious dictums, but not societal edicts. We have the ability to deceive God and tell lies in his name. People around us, on the other hand, keep a close eye on us to see where we go wrong. They aren't interested in guiding us, but they do enjoy moral policing. If I have issues, you must as well. And if you don't have any, I'll make some for you.

Please wait a minute. Is it possible to forge one's own path? Can we truly forge our own path in a vacuum? Is my life being led by me, or is it being led by the world around me? Is it possible for me to truly own my life?

The oddest aspect of this great journey is that it started with a word search. Yes, the quest for the value of life. Whatever my imagination maybe, I must test it only in this life. However, this stimulant is late in life, after countless setbacks, disappointments, tearful moments, long sighs, and anxiety phases. It is too late to celebrate these newfound moments of self-awareness. So, do we have a choice? Life vanishes before our eyes the moment we believe we have grasped it.

We love labelling people but are unwilling to look within to see what is stinking on the inside. The subconscious mind never blossoms, but rather shrinks within. We fake our lives, consistently engulfing our true selves with a fistful of mud until they are completely buried without a trace. The deceased is remembered for what he did for others by sacrificing his soul (a rusted soul). The world celebrates human life in this way and moves on with no disruption to the redundant system. People who diverge from this normalcy were labelled abnormal and mocked.

Unless we put our hearts into it, anything becomes boring after a few days, months, or years. 'Don't do any work if you don't enjoy it,' says D H Lawrence. Yes, regardless of the outcome around me or how individuals perceive me, I should undeniably create my own contentment. Today is preferable to tomorrow.

Live your life in peace, as if nothing bad were happening. Be a cheerful person. Never disseminate negativity. You understand your worth. You are aware that you are correct. That is all. Go ahead, be happy, and focus on your goal.

Moral: Never ever let people's sayings affect your decision.

It's your life, live it as you want.

Rab Rakha!!!!!

Try Giving the Toxic Relatives a Dose Of Their Own Medicine Just Once!

 

I'm sure we all have toxic, annoying relatives who despise us for no apparent reason. What is the best way to deal with them?

There has been a lot written, discussed, and acknowledged about toxic spouses, in-laws, and even parents. However, one can still find people speaking out or sharing their experiences with toxic relatives, both close and distant.

To grasp the concept of these toxic relatives, we must first define a relative. A relative is any person of any age or gender who holds a position of power in the family tree. As a result, you have a good reason to be polite to them.

Few of them are bestowed upon you by birth, while others are added through a legal process known as marriage.

Obviously, you have a few kind souls among your well-wishers. At the same time, there are those who simply cannot stand you for reasons best known to them.

They simply don't seem to like you. These are the people who enjoy throwing their weight around and never miss an opportunity to belittle you, whether through words or actions. They despise your silhouette as much as they despise your existence. And these relatives most emphatically fall into the category of toxic relatives.

The mere knowledge of their arrival would cause butterflies in your stomach. And when you do see them in person, all of their efforts revolve around slamming snide remarks down your throat. It could be anywhere. They will make comments on everything from your sense of fashion to the way you express yourself to your profession. In fact, they will not even consider factors that no one can control, such as your height, weight, or complexion!

When you call them out of courtesy, they are all set to bombard you with a slew of complaints they have against you. In some cases, the ill-treatment is so subtle and silent that only the victim is aware of it.

Even displaying your best qualities will not change these people's preconceived notions of you. You are and will remain a cretin to them, no matter how well you have proven your worth on both the professional and personal fronts.

Have you ever wondered why they don't like you?

Every attempt you make to remain cordial or engage in normal conversation will be crushed under the weight of their false prestige and ego. You might wonder what you did to them to deserve this snooty and illogical attitude. Indeed, you might wonder if these people could give you a convincing reason for their hatred if you asked them.

They would, without a doubt, have a response; whether it is convincing or not is a different story altogether. Here are some examples of possible responses:

‘Oh! You mistook my candour for rudeness!'

'I say what I think.' That's just the way I am – a book with no cover.'

'How could you possibly have thought such a thing?'

 And right there, they'll push you deep into their pool of crocodile tears. Not to mention that they will tie a boulder of guilt to your conscience and ensure that you are not at peace with yourself.

 I mean, seriously!

I'm sure I'm reading your mind!

If one could create a mathematical equation for these explanations (white lies), I believe it would look like this:

Their rudeness = honesty = naive = them being children at heart

However, your questioning of them is pure misunderstanding/illusion.

Do you have people like this in your life? The relationships in which the onus of maintaining cordial ties is constantly placed solely on you? Where, despite your best efforts, you are perpetually on the receiving end. Relationships in which your politeness is misinterpreted as cowardliness, encouraging them to maintain their high-handed attitude.

It's not that you aren't tempted to give them a taste of their own medicine. However, your high moral values and beliefs act as a roadblock. 'I know, I'm reading your mind.'

Then, for once, set those values aside, swing yourself into action, and simply give them back!

The moral of the storey is that if God can do it, then we are mere mortals!

 Rab Rakha!!!!!