In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you.

Over the last few years, I’ve done my fair share of leaving. I’ve left people, jobs, plans, projects, friendships, and my favorite city. It's heartbreaking every time, and deciding whether to stay or go can be daunting. What is the best option? What if I decide to leave and then change my mind? What if this is merely a passing phase? I understand. So here are some certain indicators I've learned to trust that signal when you've outgrown something and it's time to move on.

Dr. James Collett couldn't help but thrill when tennis star Ash Barty startled the world by revealing she was quitting the sport at age 25. It was  "really cool" and "sets a great example for people." Barty was challenging a pernicious and persistent societal stereotype that all too frequently undermines people's wellness by leaving while still at the top of her game in order to, as she put it, "step away and chase other dreams."

People who put their jobs too close to their sense of self tend to burn out and have a propensity to disregard and harm their personal relationships, which is sort of a modern societal ill. According to mental health professionals, negative cultural myths and societal pressures do more than only persuade us to stay in a depressing gig. They are also the reason why so many of us continue to be involved in friendships and relationships that are unhealthy for us.

So, how can we determine when to leave?

There are the obvious ones, according to therapists: if your partner abuses drugs, alcohol, or gambling; is a habitual liar; endangers the safety of your child; or poses a risk of causing you bodily harm. Then there are those causes that, because they are so unpleasant, people are reluctant to acknowledge. Many people are essentially in denial; they don't want to admit they've lost love, either to themselves or others.

“Once your partner and you have become detached” – the psychological term for having fallen out of love – “it’s almost like we are going back to zero, in the sense that we’re talking about the prospect of falling in love with a new person, even though we’ve got that history together,” he says. Not only is it rare to fall in love with someone – full stop – but to do so after there’s likely been “so much hurt” from that person adds an additional barrier to it happening.

When to leave a Job? The only crucial situation when you must quit [a job] right away is when it seriously jeopardizes your bodily or mental health. For everyone else, it can be helpful to consider what you want your tombstone to say. and "What do you want to be remembered for?"To be honest, people probably don't give their careers that much thought."I've discussed whether or not people wanted to leave their roles with a number of people... Actually, [for many, the issue] was a lack of self-awareness. Moreover, they were unsure of what would truly bring them joy.

In order to decide whether you're in an appropriate position or whether you need to follow a different career path, Take a deep breath, and an honest look at your basic beliefs, which may include helping people or making money and having a job of distinction.

But we also need to be cautious not to buy into the great social media lie, espoused by many employers, that there’s the “soul mate” equivalent of a job for each of us, that we should hold out for it, and walk away from anything else. “I tell all my students, ‘You’re not looking for the perfect job that you walk into, and suddenly, it’s like a cosmic alignment and you feel like you’re in the place you’re meant to be,’

Instead, a critical – and undervalued – factor that should help people decide whether a job is a keeper or not is if it will enable them to have the lifestyle they desire.“A certain level of money is great for the quality of life,” says Collett, and, of course, necessary to pay the bills. Finding some meaning in fulfillment in a job is important, too. “Beyond that, you’ve got to think about, what are you sacrificing? Are you working a lot outside of work [hours]? So often with clients, someone will say, ‘I’m stressed at work’. They’ll often be on really good money, but absolutely wrecking themselves for this job. They don’t have any free time, people have actually walked out of their lives because they don’t have time for them.”

So, stay or go?

Leaving isn’t simple. It’s actually one of the most terrifying things we as humans have to do.  Leaving something like a job or relationship or city means creating a massive tectonic shift in the foundations upon which we build our identities, and that can cause some ruptures, take some time to adjust, leave us feeling scared and weird and not knowing what lies ahead of us. It’s not always a grand leap. It can be a gentle dance between faith and fear. Maybe at the start, your fear makes you stay.

Fear there will be no more love.

Fear you will never find a better job.

Fear you will never find people who really get you.

Fear you’re being ungrateful, that it’s all in your head.

But slowly, the faith builds. It’s a gentle dance. The faith grows, the fear shrinks. Again, a little more. Until one day you wake up and the faith is bigger than the fear. You believe it now. You trust. You feel ready to step into the unknown.

If you are getting that small voice in your heart saying leave! leave! leave! It’s there for a reason. If you feel like you are being called elsewhere, if you feel like your heart yearns for more, listen to it.

Seriously, listen to it.

Rab Rakha!!!!!