In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you.

Over the last few years, I’ve done my fair share of leaving. I’ve left people, jobs, plans, projects, friendships, and my favorite city. It's heartbreaking every time, and deciding whether to stay or go can be daunting. What is the best option? What if I decide to leave and then change my mind? What if this is merely a passing phase? I understand. So here are some certain indicators I've learned to trust that signal when you've outgrown something and it's time to move on.

Dr. James Collett couldn't help but thrill when tennis star Ash Barty startled the world by revealing she was quitting the sport at age 25. It was  "really cool" and "sets a great example for people." Barty was challenging a pernicious and persistent societal stereotype that all too frequently undermines people's wellness by leaving while still at the top of her game in order to, as she put it, "step away and chase other dreams."

People who put their jobs too close to their sense of self tend to burn out and have a propensity to disregard and harm their personal relationships, which is sort of a modern societal ill. According to mental health professionals, negative cultural myths and societal pressures do more than only persuade us to stay in a depressing gig. They are also the reason why so many of us continue to be involved in friendships and relationships that are unhealthy for us.

So, how can we determine when to leave?

There are the obvious ones, according to therapists: if your partner abuses drugs, alcohol, or gambling; is a habitual liar; endangers the safety of your child; or poses a risk of causing you bodily harm. Then there are those causes that, because they are so unpleasant, people are reluctant to acknowledge. Many people are essentially in denial; they don't want to admit they've lost love, either to themselves or others.

“Once your partner and you have become detached” – the psychological term for having fallen out of love – “it’s almost like we are going back to zero, in the sense that we’re talking about the prospect of falling in love with a new person, even though we’ve got that history together,” he says. Not only is it rare to fall in love with someone – full stop – but to do so after there’s likely been “so much hurt” from that person adds an additional barrier to it happening.

When to leave a Job? The only crucial situation when you must quit [a job] right away is when it seriously jeopardizes your bodily or mental health. For everyone else, it can be helpful to consider what you want your tombstone to say. and "What do you want to be remembered for?"To be honest, people probably don't give their careers that much thought."I've discussed whether or not people wanted to leave their roles with a number of people... Actually, [for many, the issue] was a lack of self-awareness. Moreover, they were unsure of what would truly bring them joy.

In order to decide whether you're in an appropriate position or whether you need to follow a different career path, Take a deep breath, and an honest look at your basic beliefs, which may include helping people or making money and having a job of distinction.

But we also need to be cautious not to buy into the great social media lie, espoused by many employers, that there’s the “soul mate” equivalent of a job for each of us, that we should hold out for it, and walk away from anything else. “I tell all my students, ‘You’re not looking for the perfect job that you walk into, and suddenly, it’s like a cosmic alignment and you feel like you’re in the place you’re meant to be,’

Instead, a critical – and undervalued – factor that should help people decide whether a job is a keeper or not is if it will enable them to have the lifestyle they desire.“A certain level of money is great for the quality of life,” says Collett, and, of course, necessary to pay the bills. Finding some meaning in fulfillment in a job is important, too. “Beyond that, you’ve got to think about, what are you sacrificing? Are you working a lot outside of work [hours]? So often with clients, someone will say, ‘I’m stressed at work’. They’ll often be on really good money, but absolutely wrecking themselves for this job. They don’t have any free time, people have actually walked out of their lives because they don’t have time for them.”

So, stay or go?

Leaving isn’t simple. It’s actually one of the most terrifying things we as humans have to do.  Leaving something like a job or relationship or city means creating a massive tectonic shift in the foundations upon which we build our identities, and that can cause some ruptures, take some time to adjust, leave us feeling scared and weird and not knowing what lies ahead of us. It’s not always a grand leap. It can be a gentle dance between faith and fear. Maybe at the start, your fear makes you stay.

Fear there will be no more love.

Fear you will never find a better job.

Fear you will never find people who really get you.

Fear you’re being ungrateful, that it’s all in your head.

But slowly, the faith builds. It’s a gentle dance. The faith grows, the fear shrinks. Again, a little more. Until one day you wake up and the faith is bigger than the fear. You believe it now. You trust. You feel ready to step into the unknown.

If you are getting that small voice in your heart saying leave! leave! leave! It’s there for a reason. If you feel like you are being called elsewhere, if you feel like your heart yearns for more, listen to it.

Seriously, listen to it.

Rab Rakha!!!!!

When someone takes credit for your work, just smile and thank them. After all, you know the truth!

When someone takes credit for your effort, it can be very upsetting. You must be prepared to manage it because, regrettably, it occasionally occurs at work. The secret is to control your tendency to become agitated and resentful. Keep your cool and concentrate on the facts instead.

Documenting your work should come first. Keep meticulous records of the tasks you've finished, any emails or conversations you had regarding the project, and any other documentation that demonstrates your work. If the situation escalates and you need to take further action, this can be a huge help. Next, when someone tries to steal glory for your work, speak out and establish yourself firmly but calmly. Don't let co-workers who are trying to take advantage of you push you around or intimidate you. Make sure they are aware of the fact that you won't let them off the hook. Do not be reluctant to involve your management or Human Resources (HR) if the problem intensifies. They can make sure your rights are upheld and the proper measures are implemented. HR occasionally even suggests going to court if necessary.

It can be really annoying when someone steals credit for your work. It's crucial that you answer without letting your irritation and fury win. Remaining composed and professionally expressing your viewpoint is the best course of action. Speaking up and stating your position is the first step. You must succinctly and clearly lay out the relevant details of the case without coming across as combative or combative. Be careful not to accuse or criticize the individual who is taking credit for your work.

It's time to go on to the next step if the other individual refuses or is unable to accept that you are the true author. A manager or supervisor may be able to help you address the problem. If necessary, provide documentation for any evidence you have to support your claim to authorship of the in-question work. If necessary, you might also want to think about submitting a formal grievance to a regulating body like the HR department at your employer. This should only be used as an absolute last resort because it can be cumbersome and should only be used after all other options have failed.

It’s important not to let yourself become too emotional about this situation, as it will only make matters shoddier. Stay professional and focused on resolving the issue in a constructive manner so that everyone involved can move forward and put this incident behind them.

A culture of excellence in the workplace is also fostered by not claiming credit for the efforts of others. Employees are more likely to put more effort into their work and produce better results overall when they are aware that their contributions will be acknowledged. This promotes innovation and originality, which can aid a company in maintaining a competitive edge over rivals in terms of production and efficiency.

Finally, keep in mind that it is unacceptable and unethical to claim credit for someone else's work. Everyone in a workplace setting should be aware of this reality and appreciate each other's contributions equally. Everyone will then feel empowered to speak up when the work they did is erroneously taken from them. In the end, it's absolutely essential to avoid letting someone else's duplicity undermine your confidence in yourself or your professional ability. When someone tries to claim credit for your effort, be assertive but polite about it. In the long run, it might be beneficial to both sides.

 In conclusion, there are several advantages to not claiming ownership of other people's work. Not only does it show honesty, but it also promotes a culture of excellence in the workplace, fosters goodwill among co-workers, and helps build relationships between them.

 

Some of my favorite sayings aka two cents for people who take credit for other people’s work:

• “A thief is a thief whether he steals a diamond or a peach”
• “It takes a lot of effort to get ahead in life without taking credit from other people”
• “You can never really win by taking credit from others. You’re only cheating yourself in the end.”

Rab Rakha!!!!!

 

 

Is it even legitimate to set beauty expectations for women?

Women have long been socialized to believe that they should be beautiful, beginning with princess fairy tales as children. I saw a news item on my feed that I wanted to read right immediately! The caption said, "Top 50 Countries with the World's Most Beautiful Women." How can such a topic not pique your interest? South Korea came in first place, followed by Brazil and the United States. I was clearly curious to check India's ranking, and our country was ranked eighteenth. The process followed in the selection will stupefy you!

The prevalence of cosmetic surgery in that country was the sole criterion for ranking countries in terms of gorgeous ladies! Let me be clear: I am not advocating for or against cosmetic surgery. It is completely personal, and a woman has the freedom to alter her physical appearance in any way she desires.

However, this system appears to be flawed because it is primarily based on an artificial process that alters and enhances one's natural appearance. At the same time, I don't believe we need to hunt for other ways to rank a woman's beauty! The source I mentioned is not the only one. A Google search will produce numerous results ranking countries based on their attractive ladies. I've even come across an article that claims that every country has both gorgeous and "ugly" ladies. The word "ugly" is extremely insulting and contradicts basic human decency and etiquette. Women have been brainwashed to believe that they should be pretty. That begins when little girls begin reading stories about princesses and heroines who are depicted as the epitome of beauty with decent souls.

We have grown up hearing conversations about who is attractive and who is not in our daily lives. The media and tabloids will always make derogatory remarks about celebrities' and prominent figures' physical appearances. Unfortunately, the majority of the body shaming and demeaning lines are directed at women, and they are continuously examined. According to a survey done by the Independent  Research Center, society loves women mostly for their attractiveness and maternal nature. Men, on the other hand, are sought after for their honesty, professional accomplishment, ambition, and strength.

There is no exact concept of beauty! "Oh she is so beautiful!" we may have said or heard countless times. This is a perfectly natural human reaction. You may find someone really appealing, which is just OK. However, your point of view is not set in stone for everyone to follow. It is really subjective, and others may disagree. We cannot argue that only someone with delicious hair, expressive eyes, a slim frame, and soft, refreshing skin is lovely. Yes, a woman with all of these ideal characteristics may turn heads for some, but not for everyone.

As backward as it may sound, we cannot overlook our society's obsession with fair skin. Anyone with a lighter complexion is considered lovely. It's revolting to see how companies market fairness creams while sowing the seeds of color discrimination. Since the beginning of her modeling career, actor-supermodel Dipannita Sharma has been opposed to endorsing fairness creams, believing that they send the incorrect message. "They show that dark complexion is a barrier to women's success and that only fairer women can be successful, which is incorrect," she says. In an interview, Dipannita beautifully discusses the concept of beauty. She claims that it is difficult to define beauty since it involves a wide variety of attributes that are not only physical: "Beauty is something indescribable to me, something that takes my breath away, whether it's a breathtaking view, a unique personality, or just a few words."

Yes, when it comes to being clean and tidy, one's physical appearance is extremely important. I am always in favor of someone looking well-groomed, whether he or she is a guy or a woman. This is encouraged since it benefits our emotional well-being. It is, however, not the same as feeling pressured to look good for people around you. We don't need other people to tell us how good we look. The self-assurance should originate from inside.

Beauty, as they say, is only skin deep. So, instead of being superficial, focus on sincerity, and utilize that positive energy to transmit love, light, and goodness to illuminate the world around you!

Rab Rakha!!!!!

How can you spot a Male Chauvinist Pig?

They walk with a swagger and look down on the rest of the world. When it comes to women, they become a little too preoccupied with attempting to bully them or treating them as if they were their very own property. Welcome to the world of the male chauvinist pig, which you can easily detect in your immediate surroundings.

He may be a people pleaser, and he may have held the door open to impress you, but the question is how long he can continue to exhibit that expression. This person is skilled at complimenting you in public while undermining your image behind your back.

If you have set constraints, this person will undoubtedly intrude on that space, just as they do in every other aspect of your life. A true man will let a woman follow her heart, and there will never be a time when one does not know one's limit--not just in deed, but also in speech.

He lacks chivalry: He may have performed a few acts to impress you, such as holding the door for you as you entered a restaurant. What matters is if he will keep it while you go.

Creating false hopes: Knowingly, he may give someone false hope and send mixed messages. And then tell you that I'm perplexed!

Crossing the boundaries: If you have been setting limits and he intrudes, it is assumed that he is a failure. A true man will let a woman follow her heart, and there will never be a time when one does not know one's limits - not just in action, but also in expression.

He has everything to show off to the world, and he eventually wants to turn you into a Barbie doll and parade you about. He will leave you the day you gain weight!

Self-appointed critic: He will tell you that you are wrong, either directly or indirectly, practically every time you do something. He'd critique and say that because you're so close, he has to tell you. He will determine the number of breaths you should take in an hour!

If you've spotted these signs in your child, gather your thoughts, since he could be a total mama's boy. It's not that being a mamma's boy is terrible, but he will strive from the beginning to instill fear in you about his mother, implying that you must please her and be her slave. His mother might not be too horrible.

For every dispute you have with him, he may put you in a Catch-22 situation, forcing you to feel sorry and return to him. Do you really want to be with someone who seeks to change you, who does not allow you to grow as an individual?

I am so certain of these features because, since moving to Punjab from Mumbai, I have come across such men who completely dominate their wives and their wives have been my childhood friends. These men choke you to death and won't let you scream, therefore girls, beware and get rid of these narcists from your life.

Rab Rakha!!!!!

 

 

When a man gives his opinion, he’s a man. When a woman gives her opinion, she’s a bitch. Ah the double standards of our so called society!

"Women have minds and souls, in addition to just hearts." And they have zeal, expertise, and charisma on top of it all. "I'm sick of hearing that love is all a woman is made for."

Discrimination against men and women has existed for eons. Women are regarded to be subservient by society, whereas the majority of men regard themselves as dominant. It's hard to envision, yet many people around the world feel that we have achieved gender parity. But the trouble is that many still feel, deep down, that a woman cannot do everything that a man can. There are still gender stereotypes alive and well in the minds of many individuals, including many women. It is nave to not be on your own side.

I don't mean to dismiss the progress being made around the world; I'm just highlighting out that this progress needs to gain prominence, and those who dismiss these movements as meaningless and declare that women are "overreacting" need to get out from under their rock and look around.

I don't mean to dismiss the progress being made around the world; I'm just highlighting out that this progress needs to gain prominence, and those who dismiss these movements as meaningless and declare that women are "overreacting" need to get out from under their rock and look around.

I'm not sure why guys don't see us as equals and competitors, but rather as something to be "handled" and "taken care of." In a sanatorium for insane people, these are the things you say about a lunatic. I'm writing this because I still witness males dismissing women, women who are frightened to speak up for themselves, and clichés like "you play well for a girl," "stop crying like a girl," and "be a man" being bruited about.

And, for those who are still perplexed about what feminism is, here's your answer:

"Feminism is gender equality in political, financial, and social terms."

It does not imply that men should burn in hell or that women should govern the world. This word only asks for impartiality and nothing else. A feminist is someone who believes in these ideas, and I am glad to be one.

Rab Rakha!!!!!